Celebrity Dead Pool News for the Ghoulish and Depraved


Der Kommissar - page 61

Der Kommissar has 760 articles published.

Peace, Frog.

in Hits & Misses by
“Shave my armpits?! What ever for??”

Emmanuelle Riva
Actress, poet, Parisian loner.
February 24, 1927 – January 27, 2017.
Aged 89 years.

Most recognized for: Held the record for oldest Best Actress nominee (85) for her role in 2012’s Amour. Aside from that, she was in a bunch of dumb French movies.

Game Over

in Hits & Misses by
“You collect Hello Kitty Stuff too? Sweet.”

Masaya Nakamura
Film producer, businessman, Japanese amusement kingpin.
December 24, 1925 – January 22, 2017.
Aged 91 years.

Most recognized for: Widely known as “The Father of Pac-Man,” he founded Namco – the arcade company responsible for the squandering of your allowance in the 80’s, one quarter at a time.

Dead End on Della Street

in Hits & Misses by
“Ive got a box that’ll warm your meat in seconds. Of course, I’m talking about the new Amana Radar Range!”

Barbara Hale
Actress, Golden Boot winner, appliance company spokesperson.
April 18, 1922 – January 26, 2017.
Aged 94 years.

Most recognized for: Played Della Street, Perry Mason’s gal Friday… and posed for some of Gil Elvgren’s cheesecake pinup photos. So I guess that makes her a naughty secretary.

Mannix Depression

in Hits & Misses by
“They’re making a sequel to ‘Swamp Women?’ You’re shitting me.”

Mike Connors
Actor, WWII vet, Armenian chameleon.
August 15, 1925 – January 26, 2017.
Aged 91 years.

Most recognized for: Taking 17 bullets and being beaten unconscious 55 times over the course of 8 seasons as TV’s favorite glass-jawed detective Joe Mannix.

WorldStar Burns Out

in Hits & Misses by
“Harlem Shake? Does it come with a Steakburger & fries?

Lee “Q” O’Denat
Entrepreneur, viral media mogul, big dude.
July 1, 1973 – January 23, 2017
Aged 43 years.

Most recognized for: Founded WorldStarHipHop.com, a site that exposed the everyday struggles of urban youth.  A common conundrum: What in the world to do with all these perfectly drinkable bottles of champagne in this room full of dry-assed bitches?

Peace at Last

in Hits & Misses by
“I used to be a priest in the army. These days, I’m into broads.”

Charles Liteky
Army chaplain, peace activist, blood slinger.
February 14, 1931 – January 20, 2017.
Aged 85 years.

Most recognized for:  Won the Congressional Medal of Honor… and then gave that shit back. Also left the priesthood & shacked up with an ex-nun.

Officer Down

in Hits & Misses by
“What’s with all this green gibberish?”

Miguel Ferrer
Actor, musician, Clooney cousin.
February 7, 1955 – January 19, 2017.
Aged 61 years.

Most recognized for: Played Owen Granger on NCIS: Los Angeles, Robocop’s creator Bob Morton, and even got to drive a starship in a Star Trek movie.

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