Celebrity Dead Pool News for the Ghoulish and Depraved

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Hits & Misses - page 5

A chronology of the bucket-kickers.

The Short List – Feb ’21

in Hits & Misses/News & Updates by

Each month, we list the unselected dead celebs we either didn’t have time to report on… or who were just too boring to malign. So in case you were wondering “whatever happened to,” this monthly post may give you some unexpected closure.

February 1, 2021
  • Ricky Powell – Aged 59 years. Renowned hip-hop photographer and correspondent.
  • John Sweeney – Aged 86 years. AFL-CIO President Emeritus.
February 2, 2021
  • Rennie Davis – Aged 80 years. Activist, member of the Chicago Seven.
  • Albert Hale – Aged 70 years. Politician, former head of the Navajo Nation.
  • Grant Jackson – Aged 78 years. Winning pitcher for game 7 of the ’79 World Series.
February 3, 2021
  • Jim Weatherly – Aged 77 years. Pop/country singer/songwriter from the 70’s.
February 4, 2021
  • Nolan Porter – Aged 71 years. American R&B singer and songwriter known for “Keep On Keepin’ On.”
February 5, 2021
  • Charlie Krueger – Aged 84 years. Hall of Fame NFL tackle for the 49’ers.
February 6, 2021
  • George Shultz – Aged 100 years. Politician, businessman, and one of only two people to have held four different Cabinet-level posts.
February 7, 2021
  • Ron Wright – Aged 67 years. Texas republican, first sitting member of Congress to die from COVID.
  • Ralph Backstrom – Aged 83 years. Canadian, 6X NHL Champion.
February 8, 2021
February 9, 2021
  • Chick Corea – Aged 79 years. American jazz composer & Miles Davis collaborator.
February 10, 2021
  • Jorge Morel – Aged 89 years. Renowned classical guitarist and composer.
February 11, 2021
  • Rusty Brooks – Aged 63 years. Heel jobber in the early 80s who regularly got pummeled by WWF A-listers.
February 12, 2021
  • Lynn Stalmaster – Aged 93 years. Famed Hollywood casting director, first to receive an Oscar.

 

February 13, 2021
  • Louis Clark – Aged 73 years. English music arranger and keyboard player (ELO, Hooked on Classics).
  • Marco Dimitri – Aged 58 years. Weirdo Italian dubbed “the most famous Satanist in Europe.”
February 14, 2021
  • Carlos Menem – Aged 90 years. 44th and oldest living president of Argentina.
  • Ari Gold – Aged 47 years. Gay Jewish pop singer.
February 15, 2021
  • Arne Sorenson – Aged 62 years. President & CEO of Marriott International.
  • Vincent Jackson – Aged 38 years. 3x Pro Bowl WR & Tampa bay stud.
February 16, 2021
  • Carman – Aged 65 years. Grammy nominated Christian music singer/songwriter & TV evangelist.
February 17, 2021
  • Martha Stewart – Aged 98 years. No… the OTHER Martha who was an actress in the 40’s & 50’s.
February 18, 2021
  • Prince Markie Dee – Aged 52 years. The lighter complected of the 3 Fat Boys.
  • John Roach – Aged 87 years. NFL QB who backed up Bart Starr in GB.
February 19, 2021
  • Bruce Meyers – Aged 94 years. Designer of the Meyers Manx, the original Dune Buggy.
February 20, 2021
  • Stan Williams – Aged 84 years. 2X World Series Champ pitcher and pitching coach for 14 MLB teams.
February 21, 2021
  • Doug Wilkerson – Aged 73 years. 3X Pro Bowl guard for the Chargers.
February 22, 2021
February 23, 2021
  • Geoffrey Scott – Aged 79 years. American TV actor known for roles on “Dynasty,” “Dark Shadows,” “General Hospital,” and other soapy turds.
February 24, 2021
  • Ronald Pickup – Aged 80 years. English actor seen in the “Best Exotic Marigold Hotel” movies (yes… they made more than one.)
February 25, 2021
  • Darrius Johnson – Aged 48 years. NFL cornerback & member of the Broncos’ Super Bowl 32 and 33 championship squads
February 26, 2021
  • Bob James – Aged 68 years. American rock singer-songwriter for Montrose.
February 27, 2021
  • Louis Nix – Aged 29 years. NFL defensive lineman who liked to call himself “Irish Chocolate.”
February 28, 2021
  • Johnny Briggs – Aged 85 years. British soap actor who had a 30 year gig on “Coronation Street.”

Rush to Judgement

in Hits & Misses by
“So, if I’m such an vile, homophobic monster,
how on earth did I get Sir Elton John
to be my personal wedding singer?
Riddle me that,
Mr. Mayor Pete’s wife.”
 

Rush Limbaugh
Broadcaster, conservative, provocateur.
January 12, 1951 – February 17, 2021.
Aged 70 years.

Most recognized for: Love him or hate him, he asked the tough questions… like, Have you honestly ever seen an attractive feminist? What’s so great about Donovan McNabb? By ‘no,’ you mean ‘yes,’ right? Heard any good AIDS jokes lately? or Brother, can you spare Vicodin? We’re paraphrasing, of course. Regardless of whether you called his content news, editorial, hate speech, or good old fashioned entertainment, Mr. Limbaugh is definitely off the air.

Selected by: Schlitz, BGG, Raspus, Goble, A.Cadaver, Pille, D.Actuary, KBHead, T.Menschen

Ain’t Hustlin’

in Hits & Misses by
“Which one of you girls
wants to really get down & dirty…
and change my colostomy bag?
Hmmmm??”

Larry Flynt
Publisher, activist, smut peddler.
November 1, 1942 – February 10, 2021.
Aged 78 years.

Most recognized for: What’s a crippled porn king to do when he can’t jerk his gherkin? Fight for your 1st amendment rights, of course. A lightning rod for litigation, his irreverent courtroom antics included calling Sandra Day O’Connor “a token cu#t” and wearing the American flag as a diaper (for which he was jailed 6 months.) All in the name of free speech… and preserving his ability to sell you a bongo mag.

Seleceted by: BGG & Hog 1

Out of Print

in Hits & Misses by
“Whaddaya mean you don’t
carry watermelon Four Loco
anymore?!?!

 
 

S. Clay Wilson
Cartoonist, illustrator, oddball.
July 25, 1941 – February 7, 2021.
Aged 79 years.

Most recognized for: In the world of underground comics, you’d be hard pressed to find anything more bizarrely violent & pornographic than Mr. Wilson’s stuff. With depictions of bikers and pirates dismembering and raping each other, his brand of gruesome insanity regularly shocked colleagues, who viewed his style as a boundary, not to be crossed. But years after being rendered nearly mute from brain surgery, Mr. Wilson’s doodling days have finally drawn to a close.

Selected by: Deadpool Actuary

The Sound of Silence

in Hits & Misses by
“So they’re recommending people wear
two masks now? Does that mean we fellas
are supposed to go back to
wearing two condoms too?
Because THAT was comfortable.”

Christopher Plummer
Actor, Canuck, Von Trapp.
December 13, 1929 – February 5, 2021
Aged 91 years.

Most recognized for: With a career that spanned 7 decades, you’ve surely seen him somewhere. “The Sound of Music,” for starters. Not a classic cinema person? Ok… how about “Star Trek VI?” That was a real sh!tball. He won an Oscar in 2010 for “Beginners,” which no one saw. But more recently, he played the dead guy in the star-studded whodunit “Knives Out!,” which turned out to be good practice for his performance aeternam.

Mind the Gap

in Hits & Misses by
“What do I want for Christmas?
Easy. Another shot at Ali.
And then, of course,
My two front teeth.”
 

Leon Spinks
Boxer, olympian, jack-o-lantern.
July 11, 1953 – February 5, 2021.
Aged 67 years.

Most recognized for: Mr. Spinks won a gold medal in the ’76 olympics and soon after went pro. Only 8 fights later, he stunned the boxing world by defeating Muhammed Ali. Boom. Leon was a star… a big toothless star. After a short 7 months in the spotlight, he wound up handing the belt back to Ali in a rematch loss. He was later hospitalized for swallowing a chicken bone, but eventually, prostate cancer dealt the final blow.

Selected by: MPoweleit1, Schlitz, Dr.Death, K.Reaper, BGG, A.Cadaver, Pille, D.Actuary, KTBhead, Hog 2, T.Menschen

The Bell’s Toll

in Hits & Misses by
“While I stand behind my previous statement
of having slept with over 2000 women,
I’m happy to report that while here in
state prison I’m making great strides
toward matching that number with
male partners as well.”
 

Dustin Diamond
Actor, author, antagonist.
January 7, 1977 – February 1, 2021.
Aged 44 years.

Most recognized for: After spending 13 years playing TV nerd Screech Powers, Dustin wasted no time getting on with his career. He did some stand-up, a few movies, wrestled for a minute, produced/released his own sex tape, published a sordid “Saved by the Bell” tell-all book, appeared on a few drama-drenched celeb-reality shows, and was incarcerated for stabbing someone in a bar on Christmas. You know… the typical former child-star sh!t. But after a surprise cancer diagnosis, Mr. Diamond’s personal circus suddenly screeched to a halt.

The Short List – Jan ’21

in Hits & Misses/News & Updates by

Each month, we list the unselected dead celebs we either didn’t have time to report on… or who were just too boring to malign. So in case you were wondering “whatever happened to,” this monthly post may give you some unexpected closure.

January 1, 2021
  • Floyd Little – Aged 78 years. Pro-bowl running back for the Denver Broncos.
  • Mark Eden – Aged 92 years. British soap star & film actor.
January 2, 2021
  • Paul Westphal – Aged 70 years. American basketball player, head coach, and commentator.
  • Kerry Vincent – Aged 75 years. TV personality and baker seen on Food Network shows.
January 3, 2021
  • Gerry Marsden – Aged 78 years. English singer-songwriter, leader of the Merseybeat band Gerry and the Pacemakers.
  • Eric Jerome Dickey – Aged 59 years. Crime novel author.
January 4, 2021
  • Albert Roux – Aged 85 years. French restaurateur/chef.
  • Tom Acker – Aged 90 years. Right-handed relief pitcher for the Cincinnati Redlegs.
  • Gregory Sierra – Aged 83 years. TV actor known for roles on “Barney Miller” and “Sandord & Son.”
January 5, 2021
  • John Richardson – Aged 86 years. English male lead in several Italian genre films.
January 6, 2021
  • Bobby Few – Aged 85 years. American jazz pianist and vocalist.
January 7, 2021
  • Marion Ramsey – Aged 73 years. Actress known for playing Hooks, the soft spoken black officer in 6 “Police Academy” movies.
  • Michael Apted – Aged 79 years. British filmmaker, director of “The Coal Miners Daughter.”
January 8, 2021
  • Steve Carver – Aged 75 years. American film director who gave us “Big Bad Mama.”
  • Ed Bruce – Aged 81 years. American country music singer/songwriter who wrote “Mammas Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys.”
January 9, 2021
  • John Reilly – Aged 86 years. Career Soap opera actor.
January 10, 2021
January 11, 2021
January 12, 2021
  • Tim Lester – Aged 52 years. NFL running back.
  • Fred Levin – Aged 83 years. Florida attorney known for diligence against the tobacco industry.
January 13, 2021
  • Tim Bogert – Aged 76 years. Bassist for Vanilla Fudge and collaborator with Carmine Appice & Jeff Beck.
  • Sylvain Sylvain – Aged 69 years. Guitar player for The New York Dolls.

 

January 14, 2021
  • Peter Mark Richman – Aged 93 years. American bit part actor who appeared in over 30 films and 130 television series.
January 15, 2021
  • Lệ Thu – Aged 77 years. Vietnamese singer.
January 16, 2021
January 17, 2021
  • Sammy Nestico – Aged 96 years. American composer and arranger.
January 18, 2021
  • Jimmie Rodgers – Aged 87 years. Country & Western singer popular in the 50’s & 60’s.
  • Don Sutton – Aged 75 years. MLB pitcher seventh on the all-time strikeout list (3,574.)
January 19, 2021
  • Mark Wilson – Aged 91 years. Author and TV’s first magician/illusionist.
January 20, 2021
  • Ted Thompson – Aged 68 years. Big cheese with the Green Bat Packers.
  • Mira Furlan – Aged 65 years. Croatian actress who was a regular on “Lost.”
January 21, 2021
  • Randy Parton – Aged 67 years. Singer/songwriter, musician, and Dolly’s lil’ bro.
January 22, 2021
  • Tony Jones – Aged 54 years. Offensive tackle who started in 2 Super Bowls with the Broncos.
  • James Purify – Aged 76 years. Half of R&B singing duo James & Bobby Purify.
January 23, 2021
  • J.D. Power III – Aged 89 years. Businessman & founder of auto industry influencer.
  • Hal Holbrook – Aged 95 years. Veteran, award-winning actor and Mark Twain impersonator.
January 24, 2021
  • George Armstrong – Aged 90 years. Canadian pro hockey player & Hall of Fame’er.
  • Sonny Fox – Aged 95 years. Broadcaster, host of the kids TV show “Wonderama.”
January 25, 2021
  • Marie Harmon – Aged 97 years. Golden Age of Hollywood actress known for Westerns.
January 26, 2021
  • Sekou Smith – Aged 48 years. NBA reporter and analyst.
January 27, 2021
  • Goddess Bunny – Aged 61 years. Crippled tranny freakshow, actress.
January 28, 2021
January 29, 2021
  • John Chaney – Aged 89 years. American Hall of Fame college basketball coach.
  • Hilton Valentine – Aged 77 years. English guitarist for The Animals.
January 30, 2021
  • Sophie – Aged 34 years. Transsexual electronic pop musician and producer.
  • Marc Wilmore – Aged 57 years. Cast member of TV’s “In living Color” and writer for “The Simpsons.”
January 31, 2021
  • Mark Beard – Aged 72 years. NASCAR driver and team owner of Beard Motorsports.

 

 

Old Bitches Be Droppin’

in Hits & Misses by
“You wan’t some sass?!
Old broads like us love
a good old-fashioned sass kickin’!”

Cloris Leachman & Cicely Tyson
4/30/26 – 1/27/21 & 12/19/24 – 1/28/21.
Actresses, Oscar winners, nonagenarians.
Aged 94 and 96 years.

Most recognized for: Both were legendary TV & film actresses. While highly versatile, Cloris was best known for her comedy roles… while Cicely was more rooted in historical biographies that typically air in February. Both received many awards over their careers… Cloris from the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences… and Cicely from the NAACP. Regardless of who won what, these two Television Hall of Famers have finally seen their last rerun.

Down Like a Clown

in Hits & Misses by
“What do I think of Barry Bonds?
I think he’s a bitch.
A steroid-takin’ bitch.
Next question.”

Hank Aaron
MLB HOF’er, slugger, Browns fan.
February 5, 1934 – January 22, 2021.
Aged 86 years.

Most recognized for: Henry made a name for himself in the Negro league as a star outfielder for the Indianapolis Clowns (yes… that was the name of the team.) After attending a spring training in 1954, he was picked up by the Milwaukee Braves… and the rest is history. He saw 25 All-star games, broke Babe Ruth’s home run record, and was later awarded the Medal of Freedom from George Bush Jr. But just 2 weeks after getting his COVID vaccination, “Hammerin’ Hank” quietly stole home.

Death à la King

in Hits & Misses by
“If I can survive 7 marriages,
a 5-way bypass, lung cancer,
and a stroke, I can surely handle
whatever it is they’re dishing out
in Wuhan. You’ll see.”

Larry King
Broadcaster, talking head, romantic.
November 19, 1933 – January 23, 2021.
Aged 87 years.

Most recognized for: Born Lawrence Zeiger, he borrowed the last name King from a liquor store ad… and it stuck. After finding success on Miami radio & TV, he graduated to CNN in the mid 80’s with “Larry King Live.” There he interviewed crackpots like Ross Perot & Al Gore between appointments with his cardiologist. Though he stepped away from the mic in nearly a decade ago, his highness has finally quit talking.

Selected by: Kappy, K. Reaper, D. Dick, Raspus, A. Cadaver, Hog, & T. Menschen

Parole Denied

in Hits & Misses by
“If you think I look ridiculous now,
you should see pictures of me
at my murder trial.
Stay tuned!”

Phil Spector
Songwriter, record producer, freakshow.
December 26, 1939 – January 16, 2021.
Aged 81 years.

Most recognized for: A legendary hitmaker, his influence on music is as difficult to summarize as it is impossible to quantify. Commonly referred to as the “Wall of Sound” approach, his use of the studio as an additional instrument added a trademarked depth to his recordings. But quirky genius in the studio translated to outright insanity outside the studio. While serving a 19yrs to life sentence for shooting an actress in the mouth, he caught the C-bug and went from sharp to flat.

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